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Toolkit for Autistic Adults

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Alexithymia

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Quotes From Our Participants

"I think we didn't really communicate that well, so communication can be a challenge for me, certain types of communication and talking about feelings especially is something I find very hard to do, because often I don't even know what I feel myself, so I can't talk about it when I don't know what it is that I feel." (Clara, non-binary, 50, lesbian, white)

"I struggle with alexithymia. So it does mean that recognising and interpreting emotions and feelings, and what the input is telling me, is really really difficult... And then it’s really really hard to then discuss that with someone else." (Meg, agender, 36, pansexual polyamorous kinkster, white)

"Also always give space and time to those who might at present be uncertain of their needs. This is a big one for me as due to alexithymia I can be confused by my own feelings, or find it difficult to understand my needs and desires." (Swimboy, trans male, grey ace, mixed race)

"It's alarming and I didn't, I guess the autism, obviously I didn't know about it at the time, that just overloaded, I was like, what the hell just happened there, I didn't feel oh that's brilliant, I just felt that's weird. I just feel very strange. What the hell just happened?" (Eric, male, 48, heterosexual, white)

"It's...oh, how do I describe that? Um...to some degree, it's like, expressing emotions can be awkward. I recall in, like, the second relationship I was told I don't often express my emotions. And until towards the end where we just, sort of, began expressing extreme outbursts...um...but, uh...yeah, but then there were just...I did often feel very overwhelmed in the second relationship. I just sort of felt very overwhelmed. And uh...just felt whatever I did just wasn't working. Um...that's the best way I can describe that." (Ryan, male, 47, heterosexual, white)

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