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Resources we think might be helpful  

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Supported Loving Toolkit

This presentation provides some reflections on what both neurotypical and neurodiverse people can keep in mind when dating, flirting, meeting, and chatting in online spaces together 

SAAIL presentation for the Outsiders Trust 

Sexual violence and abuse 

Many of our participants said they felt they were vulnerable to being taken advantage of by others. Many had experienced sexual violence, abuse, and other traumas in their lives in the past. 

Symptomatic hypermobility and neurodivergence

The SEDSConnective 

SEDSConnective improves and actively supports the lives of people with Symptomatic Hypermobility, EDS (Ehlers-Danlos' Syndrome), Hypermobility spectrum disorder (HSD) and Neurodivergence (primarily autism, ADHD, dyspraxia, Tourette's syndrome) and associated conditions, supporting families and carers, in health, education, social care, employment, and transport accessibility. 

More information on Symptomatic Hypermobility, EDS (Ehlers-Danlos' Syndrome), Hypermobility spectrum disorder (HSD) and intimate lives coming soon to our toolkit.  


Contact  Jane Green

Twitter @JGjanegreen @SEDSConnective


Spaces to connect with other autistic people more generally

  • Autscape: Autscape is a conference with a difference. Rather than talking to a primarily non-autistic audience about autism, this conference is specifically by and for autistic people. Some of it isn't even about autism at all! Non-autistic people are also welcome, but the environment and content of the event are centred around autistic people’s needs, interests and sensitivities. Autscape lasts three days in which there are workshops, leisure activities, social opportunities, and more, all specifically oriented to the needs and preferences of autistic people

  • ALAG:  is a community organisation working in partnership with local authorities and the voluntary sector to highlight the needs of Autistic People

Resources for professionals and care providers

The Double Empathy Problem 

The Double Empathy Problem is the idea that it's not just autistic people who  struggle to process and understand the intentions neurotypical people within social interactions, but that the problem goes both ways:  neurotypical people and autistic people both struggle to  understand each other. We need a society where all people are prepared to take time and effort understand people who are different to them. This not only applies to intimate relationships, but it certainly is relevant. 

Why everything you know about autism is wrong | Jac den Houting |

Resources produced by SAAIL participants 

Neurodivergent Barriers to Intimacy:

View interactive diagram at or click on the preview image below.

About the diagram: "I drew this to show some problems or barriers an autistic person might have in finding an intimate partner. It's only a rough idea. It includes my own experience (wanting experience with women). The red circles are either autistic traits or negative outcomes. The green circles are positive factors or traits or good outcomes. The arrows show influences. The diagram can be animated. First click 'Play' and then the up or down arrows. The diagram is arranged in vicious circles that it can be hard to get out of. For example, 'ND comms' means neurodivergent communications, which may lead to our needs being misunderstood and not picking up social skills as fast as neurotypicals. However, the right support and experiences can boost confidence. The website also allows you to change or re-wire the diagram as you want. If you have any suggestions, you could send them to SAAIL."  Produced by a SAAIL participant (based on participant's own experience and shared in our online focus groups during a discussion on barriers to intimate lives)

To view resources produced by SAAIL


We're building an archive of resources collaboratively, if you can suggest any relevant resources to add, get in touch.

Our partners and collaborators

NIHR SSCR logo (002).jpg

The study represents independent research funded by the National Institute for Health and Care Research (NIHR) School for Social Care Research (NIHR SSCR). The views expressed are those of the authors and not necessarily those of the NIHR SSCR, NIHR or Department of Health and Social Care.

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